Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Jun 04, 2014 -- 7:56am

I’ll be educating you on some Smashing Pumpkins lyrics in Wrong Wrong Wednesday - and at 7:40 this morning I’ll be giving away another

$25 gift certificate to Restaurant Epic on 1131 Nuuanu Avenue.  First, that Smashing Pumpkins song:


Alright, let’s be mature about this. We all experimented in our 20s, right?  Sometimes it was with foreign substances… other times, some simple sodomy. Nothing to be ashamed of, obviously. But it can be disarming at times. Right? That’s what Billy Corgan was singing about, hence the song title, Disarm.

LA Clippers point guard Chris Paul turned 29 about a month ago but he hasn’t had much time to celebrate because, well, he’s been pretty busy lately. Of course there was the drama about their team owner and then with the play-offs. So now that he was some free time, he finally got around to opening his birthday presents and lo and behold, he received the best gift, ever! An autographed photo by actress Tiffani Thiessen — better known to '80s babies everywhere, of course as Kelly Kapowski from the kid-focused NBC high-school sitcom "Saved by the Bell. In the photo is Tiffany as Kelly Kapowski, complete with the huge hair, the huge earrings and fluorescent top.  Just the way we remembered and fantasized. Amazing birthday gift, right there. Speaking of which, you know, my birthday is next month. I’ll take an autographed photo from Tiffany Thiessen. Or even better, Carole Kai … my cougar crush. Somebody tell her, please.  Read the whole story [here].

You know you’re getting old when a story about a pair of pants gets you excited, right?  Well, here we go - the oldest pair of pants were recently discovered in China. According to Science News, they were worn by nomadic horsemen between 3,300 and 3,000 years ago. That was a big deal since men traditionally still wore gowns and stuff back then. As for the world’s second oldest pair of pants … it’s that tight pair of polyester pants sitting at the bottom of your hamper. You know, the ones you wore to church on Easter Sunday.  Still haven’t washed them yet … until the next mass you have to attend. Just me? Okay. Read the story [here].

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